Liam at 13 months

Sweet boy....you are 13 months old now! I'm still working on getting pictures together of your 1st birthday party....you were such a good boy and had a great time with all of your buddies!
At 13 months you are 26 pounds and all boy...rough and tumble for sure! You have moved up to a new class called the Kittens at school....Ms. Betty, Ms. Jane and Ms. Keisha are your teachers. You have so much more room to play and move in your new class where hopefully within weeks you'll be taking your first steps...you are so close just not quite sure enough to let go and just be free. You no longer sleep in a crib at school but you're very own little cot where you are averaging 3 hour naps daily. You are also sitting at cute little tables to eat....no more highchair at school for you! Your favorite foods right now include goldfish crackers, strawberries, bananas, spaghetti, waffles with peanut butter and anything with apples! You have also been quite the chatter box...new words this month are: "ball", "duck duck" (bathtub rubber duckie), "daddy", "mama", "bye bye" and "sheeshush" which is your way of saying Jesus!
We're also dealing with a bit of sickness lately....in the past few months you have been fighting something called RSV (Respiratory syncytial virus). RSV showed up suddenly with fevers, runny noses, heavy coughing and wheezing in your chest. You haven't slept well and daddy and I have been very worried about you. For about 2 months now we've been doing breathing treatments for you everyday and thought we had seen a great turn for the better. About 2 weeks ago, the symptoms flared up again.....our poor little man just off his game and missing the sparkle in his eye and smirky little grin. We finally took you back to the doctor today and got the best explanation of what we need to do long term to help you get better. RSV in young children can cause lung tissues to be sensitive to outside pollutants, allergens and colds. This is true esp in babies under 2 years old...the doctor described RSV as a forest fire.....it comes in and does alot of damage at once and over time it goes out but sometimes there are little embers that can flare up again until eventually they are all put out and it goes away completely. The only cure for RSV is time....and until then, any little colds or exposure to irritants/allergens can turn into things that cause wheezing, fevers,etc. We do have things that can help....for the next 3 months Daddy and I will be helping you take medicines to help you breathe better 2 times a day...Mommy will give you medicines before we take you to school, sometimes your teachers will have to give you medicines at school after you play outside and then at night, we'll do your medicines again before you go night night. The doctor also told us today this could lead to asthma down the road but we'll deal with that when and if we do face it. We did get a great report on your ears....no new ear infections and your tubes look to still be in place and working well!
As I write this Liam, I am hopeful...You are a trooper my little sunshine.....you have been through so much health wise in your first year....Everyone tells mommy this is good because it means you're getting it out of your system now instead of waiting until kindergarten.  RSV is just a temporary setback in your awesome growth and development. You are excelling in more ways than we can count in every other aspect of your world. We will beat this little stubborn virus...Daddy and I hate to see you upset, in pain, tired from all the medicines and such but we know you can beat this! You have your daddy's determination...and I am here my love to snuggle and cuddle as much as you need if you're feeling yucky. One day we'll all look back on this time and be able to say we got out ok....God is watching over you my love and He alone will heal you and make your path straight!
I love you  my sweet boy....so very much! 

1 year old...

Today, April 15, 2011, is the eve of your birthday. You are one year old…one year has passed. Fifty-two weeks, twelve months, five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes. I find myself really struggling with this concept….for so long, you were just a dream, a wish and a hope and now we’ve already had one year with you and it seems surreal. I clearly remember in full color picture in my mind your first breath on this earth…that very first moment of your life. You came out and were laid on my chest, you and I locked eyes and in a moment I became a mother and you were my son. You looked frightened and then you grabbed my finger…your five little fingers grasped mine and you took a deep breath, slowed your breathing and nuzzled your baby face into my chest. You were familiar with me and I knew in that moment you had my heart forever. We had waited so long for that moment Liam…the moment when we could finally meet after 9 long months of you growing and forming in my belly. Sometimes I wish you were still rolling and tumbling under my skin as I dream of what you’d be like. But then I look at you now, a year later, and realize I am so amazed at the gift of you. God’s gift to us and the whole family….you truly are a miracle that started as the size of a poppy seed. You have changed Daddy and I for the better. You make us better people and you make us better for each other. You have shown us the meaning of love in ways we never could imagine. Your birth reaffirmed our faith and helped us to look towards the future. Your life is a precious gift that just continues to grow and give over and over again every day we wake up in your presence. My heart swells to see you smile, laugh, dance and even cry. I love being able to hold and comfort you when are hurting or sad-knowing that you rely on me to make you feel better is humbling. I love our special time together at night when I get to sing you to sleep and brush your hair with my hand as you drift off to dreamland. I love watching you wake in the morning just like your daddy….stubborn at first and a tad grouchy but as soon as you sit up you are bright eyed and ready to face the day. From the moment your little feet hit the ground you are ready to discover. Your passion for learning excites me and I love introducing you to new foods, smells, sights and textures. You are a lover of music, bobbing your head at the second you hear a note played. You are the true definition of a rough and tumble little boy, not afraid to take a risk and overstep boundaries. You are infatuated with books and I hope that we can develop that love of reading in you for a lifetime. You love being outside, getting dirty and playing in the grass. I hope we can continue to show you the world in that way, let you learn your own boundaries and instill a sense of pride in you for taking those small moments and making them matter. Son, I want you to know that even at this young age and very beginning stages of your life, I believe in you and your abilities whole heartedly. I know that God developed you to change the world and every day I pray that God will make you a world changer and send you on a clear path with definition and purpose. Be confident in your abilities, don’t be bashful or shy, proud of where you came from and know that Daddy and I always have your back and support you with every ounce of our being. Love Jesus with your whole heart and soul. Surrender you fear and worries to Him and He alone will make your paths straight and open doors you could never imagine. Be a man of honor, courage and strength and be the one to set the example for your friends and loved ones. Be inspiring, encouraging and helpful to others…giving back gives you peace and develops your character as a person.

As we close this chapter of your life and look towards the next year ahead, know that I will miss your true newborn/baby year. The helplessness that only Daddy and I could provide help for. Knowing that you relied on us for everything and that our faces were the first ones you ever recognized. Your sweet baby smells and yes even late nights changing wet or stinky diapers. Hearing your first laughs, watching your first smile, your first crawls, claps, screams, tears and discoveries. Seeing your mind work as you learned about new toys, new things in our house and new people. Watching Grammie, Grandpa, Nani and Pops with you and the joy in their new grandson. You are their gift, their promise of the next phase of their lives and their renewal as they watch us raise you. I am ready baby boy…ready for year 2….ready to hear you speak your first words, ready to watch you walk, run and jump. To see you feed yourself, learn how to swim this summer, get dirty in our yard, wrestle with daddy, make new friends, discover the holidays through your toddler eyes. I love you with my whole heart and soul Liam. You will forever be my tiny newborn who fit snuggly in my arms even as you grow in the man God wants you to become. Happy birthday my love….Happy Birthday!

This sums it all up..

The joy we felt last night celebrating the New Year is summed up in this one single shot of Liam. The month of December has been the best of 2010 by far. Watching the joy of the holidays through the imagination of our son was something I will never forget. His joy was contagious, his curiosity was infectious and his laughter was priceless. To know that God blessed us with the gift of His Son during the Christmas season and then some 2000 years later, we were blessed with this son to watch during Christmas and to celebrate is beyond anything I can even begin to comprehend. Per my last post, it was definitely a crazy 2010. But last night as the clock struck 12 we heard our sleeping boy stirring in his crib upstairs and we just knew he had to join in our celebrating. He was the best gift of this year and he had to be there to help us say goodbye to the year he was born and help us ring in the year he will continue to grow into a little man. Adam ran upstairs while I entertained friends and watched the ball drop....and then it hit me...the year my son was born is over. It was a weird feeling to think I could say I gave birth "last year" but I was grinning ear to ear with the next thought of Liam turning 1 "this year." And I watched as Adam brought Liam down the stairs to join in our festivities and I paused with him on the stairs. His eyes were filled with tears and I wiped one away as it rolled down his cheek. I just knew the feeling had overwhelmed him and he said "I just lost it upstairs...I picked him up out of his crib and it was just one of those moments when it hit me that he is my son." We both just stood there and grinned, our sleepy boy in his green footie pj's with his hair messy from his crib, and we had a family moment....just the 3 of us...2010 was over....the year of challenge, sickness, happiness, depression, tears, smiles and so much more. And we were all together to celebrate the start of a new year together....our first "full" year with our sweet boy....and it was time to just smile, hug our boy, kiss my sweet husband and enjoy the moment. We stayed up long after our friends left....and just chatted about Liam....as he lunged towards us with huge sloppy wet kisses and smiles that could make the most sad person smile. Trading stories back and forth about our year and how much Liam has changed us for the better. So much joy, joy beyond measure....